Setting: a frosty February day in New York City. Cort Marshall sits on a park bench, Steely Dan shirt tucked into his jeans that are pulled just slightly too high. Overtop, more denim--the Canadian Tuxedo worn by the American patriot. He stares into the maudlin grey afternoon sky with a pensive expression and sighs. Reaches into a pocket for a pack of smokes, pulls one out, sighs again, puts it back in his pocket. Reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a packet of Popeye’s candy cigarettes. Sticks one into his mouth.    Now his arm moves down below the bench and the camera pans to a 12-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon. Cort removes a can, brings it to his lips, takes a second look… and puts it back down. Again he reaches down but now to the other side, revealing a Pepsi Zero. He cracks the can open and sips the soda, candy cigarette still in his mouth like a real pro.   Countless pedestrians walk by taking in the snowy New York scenery. Tourists stop to take photos while trying to dodge the overly-friendly street performers. A short goblin-esque man tells a trumpet busker he once knew Bob Dylan.   One of the passers-by stops in front of the bench and turns toward the former Pride Champion.    ???: Need a light?   Cort takes the faux cigarette out of his mouth and tries to show the man that it’s candy only to find the man already sitting next to him.   Cort: No thanks, buddy--   Cort stops himself as he recognizes the man dressed head to toe in fashion Cort might’ve won 20 years ago as none other than former OCW World Champion Maxx Edwards.   Cort: Hey, what the hell are you doing here?   Maxx looks around at the snow topped trees and the kids gripping their mother’s hands.   Maxx: Wanted to see what all the fuss was about.   Maxx: I heard all the cool kids are on the verge of unemployment these days.   Cort: Aww, don’t talk like that. At one point I was the second-most famous choker behind David Carradine.   Maxx: How the mighty have fallen!   Maxx: It’s obvious I learned that from watching the best.   The two share a laugh. Cort crunches on his candy cigarette contemplatively.   Cort: Well ya know, winning ain’t everything. I guess after all this time, people still remember me, for one reason or another. But it still feels weird being out there in front of the crowds again. So many people I thought for sure were lifers are gone, and so many people I thought for sure were no-lifers are livin’ it up.   Cort: I mean, AC Cobra. When the hell did that guy get so good! And where does he get off wearing the Jersey Shore Dracula outfit!   Maxx: I guess it’s best that some are gone then. Keep the image alive, y’know.    Maxx: You either die a hero or live long enough to become someone’s “hammer” or something like that.   Maxx awkwardly laughs.   Maxx: But I guess who am I to be talking right?   Maxx: I’m out here in the negative degree weather with Cort Marshall.   Maxx: Livin the B-List Gimmick   Cort claps Maxx on the back.   Cort: Well y’know, it’s like the band said--any minor world that breaks apart falls together again. I don’t really feel like wearin’ the flag that defined both of my careers that much anymore… but maybe I will again. And you’re not wearing that world heavyweight title right now… but maybe ya will again.   Maxx: Well just cause you carry the same banner doesn’t make you the same person. Sometimes for better…sometimes for worse.   Maxx: Sure I might hold that gold again, but it’ll be different next time. The same way this time it was different than the time before that.    Maxx: Same way you’re no spring chicken anymore, I mean hey do you even still train, or have the bolts rusted off by now.   Cort gestures to the soda box.   Cort: Zero sugar! And I get my cardio from chasing down the nincompoops who won’t show up at call time.   He shakes his head.   Cort: Jokes aside, I know the odds ain’t on my side if it comes to blows with Quartz. I’ve been out of the game for a while. But sometimes you just gotta draw a line in the sand, stand up and say--this far and no farther, ya know?   Maxx: I hear ya, as long as there’s evil there’ll be a dumbass standing in their way. And I’m just saying, worse comes to worst…   Maxx: I wouldn’t mind being a dumbass right next to ya.   Maxx reaches out his fist to Cort. Cort looks from the frosted scenery back to his fellow OCWfedite. He fist-bumps back.   Cort: So far, I’d like to do this one on my own… but I’ll keep the offer in mind, brother.   Maxx nods, and the camera pulls back, up and away through the slowly-falling snow as we fade out.

ty for your efforts

HA! See that? Baka Lya-chan! Junko is better than you!